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View Full Version : Michael Singletary facts!



Ghostrider
06-19-07, 10:52 AM
Please feel free to add your own....



1. Guns don't kill people. Michael Singletary kills People.

2. There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Michael Singletary allows to live.

3. Michael Singletary does not sleep. He waits.

4. The chief export of Michael Singletary is Pain.

5. Michael Singletary has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.

6. The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Michael Singletary 3. Cancer

7. Michael Singletary drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.

8. Michael Singletary is my Homeboy.

9. Michael Singletary doesn't go hunting.... Michael Singletary GOES KILLING

10. Michael Singletary doesn't lose, he just counts his rings...

Ghostrider
06-19-07, 11:02 AM
When Michael Singletary does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

Ghostrider
06-19-07, 11:04 AM
If at 1st you do not succeed at Baylor, you are not Michael Singletary...

It is scientifically impossible for Michael Singletary to have had a mortal father. The most popular theory is that he went back in time and fathered himself.

grande rojo
06-19-07, 11:18 AM
The only reason why Mike Singletary has a phone book is so he can rip it in half.

BackToTeaff
06-19-07, 11:50 AM
Michael Singletary is a winner. Baylor football is a.........the second favorite team for all UT, A&M, and Tech fans. And the source of ridicule for UT fans when they get to chant to their opponents after a thorough whipping....WORSE THAN BAYLOR.

Ghostrider
06-19-07, 11:58 AM
uh, that doesnt go here :)

EatMoreSalmon
06-19-07, 12:32 PM
When Mike Singletary goes to The Big Texan restaurant, he eats three 72 oz. steaks in an hour....then orders dessert.

EatMoreSalmon
06-19-07, 12:45 PM
When Mike Singletary gets a haircut, the trimmings are sold to be used in the manufacture of bullet proof vests.

ScrappyPaws
06-19-07, 01:24 PM
Mike Singletary once killed a man by looking at him, the ensuing convulsions of death inspired the Super Bowl Shuffle.

deltbear
06-19-07, 02:04 PM
Mike Singletary's 49'ers sucked last season and finished with a 7-9 losing record, just one win better than the Texans!!!!

Paddington
06-19-07, 02:38 PM
Mike Singletary's tears cure cancer -- it's a shame he never cries.

ScrappyPaws
06-19-07, 02:45 PM
Mike Singletary's 49'ers sucked last season and finished with a 7-9 losing record, just one win better than the Texans!!!!

do you ever get frustrated with missing the point all the time??? u wont mind if we continue to pass the off season with humorous one liners about the greatest football player to ever don the G&G?

BackToTeaff
06-19-07, 03:03 PM
Yeah 1321, and I believe it wouldn't take Mike five years to get 7 wins at Baylor! Put on your burnt orange cap and start chanting Worse Than Baylor some more.

NORSEMAN
06-19-07, 03:35 PM
Yeah 1321, and I believe it wouldn't take Mike five years to get 7 wins at Baylor! Put on your burnt orange cap and start chanting Worse Than Baylor some more.

Well, hell, BTT...go ahead and fire Morriss and his staff and bring Mike in. The movement to do so remains and you shouldn't have much trouble signing on and getting a ticket to ride. I think it'd be funny and understandable if Guy and his staff resigned the day before two-a-days, and ride off giving us the middle finger of fate wave.

You need professional help, dude.

Ghostrider
06-19-07, 04:40 PM
ok, back to Michael Singletary facts....

grande rojo
06-19-07, 04:42 PM
Mike requires no nourishment. When he eats, he does it for population control.

Ghostrider
06-19-07, 04:46 PM
:lol2

Ok, now if we can somehow relate this back to Baylor....

Hvegas
06-19-07, 04:58 PM
Michael Singletary donates blood daily...just never his own.

Hvegas
06-19-07, 04:59 PM
The fastest way to a man's heart is Mike Singletary's fist.

Hvegas
06-19-07, 09:02 PM
Mike Singletary once infiltrated a small convent in the hills of Sicily impregnating all of the nuns. 9 months later those nuns gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only team in the history of the NFL to go undefeated.

Longtime
06-19-07, 11:16 PM
Wow. A Jack Bauer do-over list.

BearAskedNekked
06-19-07, 11:52 PM
Mike Singletary walked away from under the South Tower.

RD2WINAGNBEAR86
06-20-07, 12:02 AM
Mike Singletary rode off into the sunset long ago. He will do well and deserves all of the success he will certainly achieve. As far as Baylor University football is concerned? Hell, I'll be tickled to death if we can beat RICE!!!!

SWT( Texas State) will give us a hell of a game. Buffalo will be our bi*ch. This is after the Baylor Bears bend over and spread their cheeks in the season opener at Amon Carter Stadium in Fort Worth.

Mike Singletary deserves better and is long gone.

RD2

tommie
06-20-07, 12:35 AM
Mike Singletary thought up some of the funniest Mike Singletary facts ever, but he hasn't submitted them to the site because he doesn't believe in any form of submission.

CNC
06-20-07, 12:42 AM
Mike Singletary has 7 kids that are 10 years apart from youngest to oldest. He's only had sex once.

Ghostrider
06-20-07, 12:43 AM
Mike Singletary thought up some of the funniest Mike Singletary facts ever, but he hasn't submitted them to the site because he doesn't believe in any form of submission.

:lol2 :lol2 :lol2 awesome

George Betros
06-20-07, 09:18 AM
Please feel free to add your own....



1. Guns don't kill people. Michael Singletary kills People.

2. There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Michael Singletary allows to live.

3. Michael Singletary does not sleep. He waits.

4. The chief export of Michael Singletary is Pain.

5. Michael Singletary has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.

6. The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Michael Singletary 3. Cancer

7. Michael Singletary drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.

8. Michael Singletary is my Homeboy.

9. Michael Singletary doesn't go hunting.... Michael Singletary GOES KILLING

10. Michael Singletary doesn't lose, he just counts his rings...


This post is completely inappropriate at this time.

Longtime
06-20-07, 04:13 PM
BTT.

Prove it.

Give me one fact.

Give me Mike's head coaching record.

SteveO '04
06-20-07, 04:16 PM
One time Mike Singletary ate a rubix cube.....he **** it out solved

BackToTeaff
06-20-07, 04:25 PM
The only way we can ever get Mike is now. If you want him to go win a few Super Bowls before he is worthy of Baylor, you are putting too much pure cane sugar in your Dr Pepper, Long. Guy Morriss' coaching record at Baylor is enough for me to push Mike. We of all people know Mike's special qualities better than most. He is already getting head NFL coaching interviews. For you all to want him to go win in the NFL or at other big schools, before he would be worthy at an elite program like Baylor's....is beyond me.

ScrappyPaws
06-22-07, 12:02 AM
Mike Singletary rode off into the sunset long ago. He will do well and deserves all of the success he will certainly achieve. As far as Baylor University football is concerned? Hell, I'll be tickled to death if we can beat RICE!!!!

SWT( Texas State) will give us a hell of a game. Buffalo will be our bi*ch. This is after the Baylor Bears bend over and spread their cheeks in the season opener at Amon Carter Stadium in Fort Worth.

Mike Singletary deserves better and is long gone.

RD2

We lose to Rice,TxSt, or Buffalo and I'm starting a letter writing campaign to MS and the BOR. Until that day comes (Heaven FORBID), Sic'em Bears.

Pat Neff
06-22-07, 12:33 AM
The only way we can ever get Mike is now. If you want him to go win a few Super Bowls before he is worthy of Baylor, you are putting too much pure cane sugar in your Dr Pepper, Long. Guy Morriss' coaching record at Baylor is enough for me to push Mike. We of all people know Mike's special qualities better than most. He is already getting head NFL coaching interviews. For you all to want him to go win in the NFL or at other big schools, before he would be worthy at an elite program like Baylor's....is beyond me.

Freakin A, this may be the biggest blow job of online porn ever displayed to those younger that 18.

Once again dumbass, he is getting HC interviews due to an NFL rule that you have to interview people of color. Could you please explain what part of this you don't get? I'll type more slowly if you need more time to read.

I have not heard of him gettin a second interview for any HC job yet. It may be that he's too busy getting some sort of sexual favor from you, but hay, you have to make some decsions in life.

BTT, go look at what this position coach has done at the NFL level so far. You take away the MS name, then you pretty much get a guy like you stoking the stick trying to make policy decisions.

sicem10
06-22-07, 04:05 AM
Mike Singletary once got an erection while laying on his stomach and struck oil.

ljdjr328
06-22-07, 06:00 AM
Mike Singletary once got an erection while laying on his stomach and struck oil.

Don't you mean the Dorr brothers got the erection - just thinking about MS!!

ScrappyPaws
06-22-07, 06:35 AM
Freakin A, this may be the biggest blow job of online porn ever displayed to those younger that 18.

Once again dumbass, he is getting HC interviews due to an NFL rule that you have to interview people of color. Could you please explain what part of this you don't get? I'll type more slowly if you need more time to read.

I have not heard of him gettin a second interview for any HC job yet. It may be that he's too busy getting some sort of sexual favor from you, but hay, you have to make some decsions in life.

BTT, go look at what this position coach has done at the NFL level so far. You take away the MS name, then you pretty much get a guy like you stoking the stick trying to make policy decisions.

Damnit, this is what I hate. So, cuz BTT likes Mike, now Mike is "some guy stokin the stick..." STFU. The man is quite possibly the best defensive player to ever play the game, and is currently the Asst. Head Coach of the 49ers, not just a position coach. BTW, did Wade do a SECOND interview?? nope. one and done, that's how it often is (not always) in the NFL, they don't do "call backs", they interview and they get it or they don't.

Have some respect for not only a great alum, but the parent of one of our current committs.

JETHRO
06-22-07, 06:59 AM
The grand canyon used to be a city, but Mike Singletary farted.

saabing bear
06-22-07, 08:39 AM
Mike Singletary has b***h slapped Chuck Norris, Bill Braskey, and Godzilla to tears.